There came a point where I stopped writing this book because I was going through a lot of personal drama, and was definitely not feeling like I was enough.
I was questioning myself about writing a book covering this particular topic when I felt like a fraud when I felt so sad, so heartbroken, and devastated. So, I stopped for about a month.
But then… one of my girlfriends Jacquelyn came to the rescue. While visiting from out of town, she dragged my grief-stricken soul out for dinner. In a modestly-crowded restaurant, I found a seat at the bar and noticed an older gentleman nursing his drink beside me. Poor guy had no idea what he was in for when he asked me how I was doing that night. Yes, I completely… verbally… vomited all over him.
After he picked his jaw up off of the floor from having endured my heartfelt, but very real story about Mr. N, he said to me: “This is the best time to write your book. You are hurt, confused, and lost. You are questioning every decision you have made in the last five years and you are using the tools you have been giving to your clients in order to get back on track. People want to hear your story. Your struggles. Your triumphs.”
This is why I decided to include a chapter giving you the backstory of my ex-husband. The man I will call “Mr. N.” Throughout our marriage I caught Mr. N in hundreds of lies, being disloyal, and having an affair for over 14 months of our 2.5 year marriage. But despite all of the atrocious things he did, it was me who was treated like "the enemy.” Mr. N refused to be accountable, was not genuinely remorseful, and despite being so caring and concerned for my well-being in the past, treated me as if I didn’t exist.
What I came to realize was that I was in love with a Narcissist. This is what I dealt with for the last five years of my life. Mr. N, who used to "adore me like no other," made me begin to believe I was “never good enough.” I was blamed for all of the problems in the relationship, no matter how much I tried to explain, prove, fix things, or justify myself. We divorced in 2016 (don’t worry all the juicy details that lead to the divorce are in the book!).
So what did I do to find closure? I began working my 5-Step System. During this process, I was able to identify and focus on three little words to help me gain closure: Release. Your. Trauma. I had to get the trauma out of my inner being. The trauma that caused me to hurt continuously and kept me stuck was prohibiting me from moving forward. It was stopping my well-being in all areas of life. It was difficult work but I would not be here today if I had not worked through the 5 steps.
If you are at the point where enough is enough, I want you to hold my hand and let’s begin this journey together. Today is the day you begin moving from struggle to strength! I'm going to show you how to: (1) make the changes that are not just going to set you on the path to creating the life you have always dreamed of, but (2), to also uncover the answers as to why your life has not turned out the way you thought it would.
You are enough. You have the ability to dream any dream and follow it, and live your best life possible.